First off, I don’t think things are terrible. I don’t think that our youth is completely rotten and I don’t think all is lost. However, I DO think that we are really letting lots of kids down.

I think it starts with the kinds of advice we give kids starting early in childhood and on into high school. It’s creating a group of entitled, over-thinking people with heads in the clouds.

Lets look at the three biggest culprits in this unintentional blitz on America’s ability to work hard and enjoy life.

1. Work Smart, Not Hard

This, along with any other propaganda language from universities in the 60’s and 70’s touting that a four-year college, is the only way to succeed in life – RIGHT? Mike Rowe (yeah, the guy from Dirty Jobs and Ford commercials) has made this his soap box topic. He recalls a day in his guidance counselors office, telling her that he had no idea what he wanted to do in life, so he thought that college would be a waste until he knew. So he was headed to a Community College. She was disappointed and pointed to this poster on her wall saying “Do you want to end up like the guy on the right?:

It wasn’t that long ago that blue-collar jobs were praised. We don’t think back to the first half of the 20th century and remember bankers and academics. We remember the iron workers that built our cities, the auto workers that built the American automobile and the farmer who produced the food that fed a growing and pride-filled country. Now, because kids are told by parents and educators alike that they need to go to college to succeed, we have a huge shortage in skilled labor. Machine shops across the country are looking for skilled workers to run their CNC machines – most paying well over $20/hour. A 6 month technical degree from a community or technical college is all you need to get in the door. By the time 40 hits, you could be look at shop foreman – with a salary over $70K. We’ve got gaps in skilled factory jobs (due in some part because unions have made it impossible to fire those workers who are NOT skilled) and all they are looking for is capability, not know-how. The IT industry is suffering from this phenomenon as well – people are just unaware that 1 or 2 certifications, that can be obtained at a technical college, are all it takes to become a network operations engineer – bringing in a comfortable salary with a large IT company. Of course, the IT industry has also suffered from schools and guidance counselors constantly underestimating the expansion of the industry. In the late 90’s and early 2000’s, it was very common for an academic advisor to advise against pursuing anything IT for fear of the market shrinking significantly. Whoops.

I am not saying that college isn’t the right idea – I just think it’s ridiculous that skilled labor jobs are so frowned upon. As it stands, we have too many kids going to college not knowing what they want to do, taking on student loan debt and graduating with a history or psychology degree and having absolutely nothing to show for it. How is that better for the student or for society than waiting or pursuing other avenues?

The other side of this saying is that working hard is no longer a thing to be praised. It’s not cool to work hard. Cool is getting rich quick or having as cushy a job as possible. We are so obsessed with work/life balance that we forego the responsibility that comes with getting a pay check. I see it everyday in the corporate world – no matter where things are with a project, no matter the importance of a deadline and no matter what might have to change down the line in the project – the time to arrive is 8:30 and the time to leave is 5:30. It happens even in advertising, an industry that it notorious for long hours. In my mind, my paycheck comes with a responsibility to get things done. If getting things done means I am here until 4am – I am here until 4am. The sense of entitlement is outrageous. As if the company that is paying us, giving us healthcare and, in my case working in the ad world, giving me perks like company events, Christmas gifts, a shuffleboard table and a constant supply of beerz in the fridge should understand that I have an appointment to get my oil changed right at 5PM (never-mind the fact that the auto shop is open on the weekends and until 7). I am also really intrigued by the idea of how sacrifice in the workplace may just be the key to success – but that’s another post.

Finally, we have equated “working smart” with doing less – which was never the intention. It’s really just all backwards. To me, working smart is about proper prioritization, communicating as clearly as possible with my team and being the guy with the answers. All of this comes from working hard first.

My alternative advice: Work hard in order to work smart.

2. You can be anything you want to be if you try your hardest 

So this is piggy-backing off of my initial thought, but it’s an issue just the same.

The fact is, if you are not tall you won’t be an NFL tight end. If you are not a steady-handed quick-learner you will not be a surgeon. If you are not good with numbers, then accounting is not your jam. It doesn’t matter how bad you want it or how hard you work to get there. It’s not going to happen. Sorry, kid.

The good news is, there is a better way. I think when looking out into the career/adult world, you have to ask yourself what are the things that would make you content in a job? What traits and talents do you have that would be best served in a particular position?

This isn’t about not pursuing dreams and it’s not about doing what you want. But it IS about looking at life as a whole. 10 years ago, I thought I might want to go to law school or maybe become an architect – I really didn’t know. I will tell you what I didn’t think – not with an ounce of my brain – that I would be working in Advertising in Cincinnati. But I tell you what, it worked out perfectly.

And the reason why it’s perfect is because I found a vocation that takes advantage of the things I do well, avoids the things I am terrible at (sort of, still working on my timeliness and my personal prioritization).

That allows me to feel good about my job as a whole – even though it’s not what wish I was doing (which is working at a nice golf course as the starter and playing golf every day). The fact is, my enjoyment comes the things that are outside of my vocation. I love my wife, my dog, Oklahoma State athletics and drinking a nice beer (or a not so nice beer, just beer really). There are also things I love about my job, for instance, my coworkers are some of my closest friends (a blog post for later).

My Alternative Advice: Working hard won’t change who you are (you’re still a 5’4″extrovert with punctuality problems and lack of ability to leave an argument early)  – but working hard because of who you are is capable of making  you supremely content and satisfied. Take pride in your personal strengths and pursue a way to exploit them.

3. Do what you love and you will never work a day in your life!

Classic, right? But totally dumb if you think about. Some bleeding-heart liberal wanted to make everyone feel really, really good at the same time covering up the sadness associated with whatever shortcomings were associated with what they did for a job.

This really is an easy one to debunk: ask any entrepreneur – doing what you love is definitely work. The pastry chef that shows up at 4am everyday to make that day’s round of breakfast morsels loves doing the baking – but hates the fact that baking means being up a 4am dealing with inventory management and invoicing each month. Much like I tried to state above – you WILL be taking the good with the bad, the question is – where do you get the good?

I do believe that people get into jobs (especially entrepreneurs) because they love them – and I believe that they benefit from doing that every day. I do NOT believe that they are supremely satisfied with the job. In the end, it’s still a job.

Bringing this back to the youngsters – many entrepreneurs are people who did something else first and did not find satisfaction. You could say that is because they were doing something they hated (or something that they didn’t love) – but I would argue they were doing something that did not take advantage of who they were (see above).  I would also argue that, in my person circles, most entrepreneurs take learnings from other jobs and experiences and bring them into the startup.

For me – its about end, not the means. If I thought a golf course starter position could give the kind of life I want for myself and my family, then I would do it. But I am not going to do it and pretend like I will somehow be more happy because my job is less miserable while the rest of my life is more miserable.

My Alternative Advice: Find what you love & pursue a vocation that will help you get more of it. Be it time at home, yellow cars, opportunities to cook or interaction with new people. Don’t let the fact that you enjoy something blind you to the challenges that may come.

FINALLY: For the record, I think people should take chances and become entrepreneurs – especially if they think they have what it takes to make it work (I did). I think people should go to school and study something that they enjoy (I did). I think that pursuing a History degree is valuable, if you plan to use it.

Kids need more simple truth and less feel-good crap. They need more understanding that personal happiness and value come from a number of places in life. Choosing/falling into/finding the job/career that is not the one you want does not have to mean your life lacks something grand.